Project Runway Season 8: Karma is a Bitch Named Ivy

This season of Project Runway has been pretty great, and the show seems to have bounced back from its creative slump. Of course the episode where Mondo revealed his HIV positive status (reflected in the plus signs of the gorgeous print he used) after Nina teased it out of him, was a water-cooler moment for this show. He hadn’t even told his family or friends at the time the episode was taped; he literally came out as HIV positive on the show.  It’s been 16 years since Pedro Zamora on The Real World introduced a generation of viewers to a real life HIV positive person, setting a high water-mark for Reality TV which, at its best, can produce these culturally redefining moments. And while things have certainly gotten better (in terms of medical advances and public opinion), there’s still ways to go, and stories like Mondo's are always important to feature.

Unfortunately, Mondo squandered all that goodwill by being an unpleasant, entitled ass in the last episode. He sulked through a challenge he didn’t like (sportswear for Heidi’s line) and was rude to Heidi, whose Tim Gunn-like criticism in the workspace actually led to a better output that almost won him another challenge (to which he ungraciously never copped). And yet Mondo still wasn’t the worst person in this episode. 

Given that Chris and Andy are darling, Michael is a likable underdog, and April is more or less cool, you’d think I was referring to Gretchen. She still has an inflated opinion of her (mostly) good designs, and still can’t take criticism, which Heidi advised her to start doing, but the Catch-22 is Gretchen can't even take the criticism that she should take criticism so it was all pointless. Gretchen: “Heidi hates me.” Please. You’re not even high enough on Heidi’s Priority List for her to hate you, so get over yourself. This is the fascinating place where insecurities and narcissism meet, where your low self-esteem produces a conclusion so ridiculous that it requires a level of self-involvement to think that someone else cares enough to hate you. You know?

This is all my way of saying…I wasn’t even referring to Gretchen. No, to find someone truly reprehensible, the producers had to pull from past contestants, who were ushered in to help the designers. The bitch in question is Ivy, who still can’t freaking let go of her bitterness towards Michael, even though she was eliminated two weeks ago! She makes things super uncomfortable by accusing Michael of cheating (again) and sabotaging her (again). What was that I said about insecurity and narcissism again? Her bitterness is so transparent she’s (to quote MC) “bathing in Windex.” Someone is definitely OBSESSED with Michael.

Not only does she make these accusations during the challenge -- distracting Michael and earning him even more underdog points, so great job there dumbass! – but she also takes it to the producers, and then goes one by one to each contestant to brag that she “took one for the team”, and expecting to bask in their praise. It was gratifying to see that no one really gave her the adulation she was looking for (probably because they were busy doing an effing challenge) and in fact, no one else really berated Michael either. Awesomely, the producers and the editors made it crystal clear that she was the villain, and oh how I wish I could watch this episode back with her!

First, Time Gunn pooh-poohs the cheating accusation, rightfully reminding her that “the judges saw nothing on the runway, I saw nothing in the workspace, and our many cameras caught nothing.”  He’s basically like, who you gonna believe: me and my cameras, or your bitchy, bitter eyes?

But the awesomeness didn’t end there. Before the challenge, Heidi praises Michael’s sewing talents, and cattily adds, “Who was it that said you couldn’t sew again? Oh right, they’re not here anymore.” HA! Heidi's gun may be pink (not Tim) but it's not filled with water. And then the editors also get in on it by showing Ivy self-righteously promising, “Karma is a bitch”, and then immediately cutting to her in the workspace getting smacked in the face with a projectile! HA HA! Oh yeah, that's the stuff.

Finally, Andy won the challenge and it all came down to Michael vs. Christopher. Now here’s the thing about Christopher: he’s cute, very cute in fact, and one of the nicest people ever on this show. Everyone loves him. Unfortunately his designs are incredibly boring. Not even bad, just…blah. And that kind of middle-of-the-road unremarkable competence helps you skate by easily on this show (you’ll never win a challenge, but you’ll always be inoffensive enough to survive elimination against a real train wreck) but it catches up to you, usually just before Final 4 or Final 3. And I think that narrative would have continued again – Michael’s designs for this challenge were absolutely hideous – but there’s no way the producers were going to let Michael go right after being pummeled all episode long by Ivy. Basically, Michael survived so the underdog narrative could play out for this round, and I’m OK with that, even if it meant saying goodbye to Cute Chris.

So now we’re down to five. Who will make it to Fashion Week? Well…all of them actually, if you know anything about this show’s schedule. I wish they’d stop pretending that they don’t let as many as 5 or 6 people go to Bryant Park just to preserve the secrecy of the Final 3. Look, every taped show has spoilers. Whoever wants to be spoiled will peruse fashion blogs, and whoever doesn't, won't. The producers should just let the Final 3 go to Fashion Week and, you know, make it work.